Have you ever looked at someone with intent and wonder?   This is a look that moves beyond judgment and looks deep into the mystery of Who is here in this person.  When this happens, you begin to become aware of how wondrous this person is – the untold stories of strength, pain, joy, fear, and everything else that may never have surfaced even in behavior.  This may be easier to do with a stranger than with someone we feel we “know” well, but this is not necessarily the case.

I have experienced this with many people, but lately and most especially with my mother.  When I look at her, I see the woman, who with my dad and God, loved me and my two siblings into life.  I see a woman who has had her share of pain and joy in her life, and still smiles and speaks in gratitude.  But when I look at her, I see that I don’t “know” or see a lot.  She is a mystery to me and to everyone.  Though those who “know” her can rattle off her likes and dislikes, what grates her nerves and what tickles her to laughter, still there is so much none of us know and will never know about her sacred internal life, at least here in this life.  That is an awesome realization and hints to just how special, unique and loved each of us are by the magnificent God who created us.

We tend to be quite self-assured in our perceptions of people based on the behavior that we observe.  Without discrediting this practical and even necessary way of dealing with each other in this way, if we lose sight of the unique and wonderful creation that we all are, we can behave with indifference and even outright hatefulness.  Indeed sometimes we rely too much on ostensible behavior, correlating good and bad behavior with intentions and attitudes that match the actions.

Matthew’s gospel (Mt 7:21-29) today points this out with sternness:

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’
will enter the Kingdom of heaven,
but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven.
Many will say to me on that day,
‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name?
Did we not drive out demons in your name?
Did we not do mighty deeds in your name?’
Then I will declare to them solemnly,
‘I never knew you. Depart from me, you evildoers.’

Rather than strictly a condemnation of hypocrisy, I find Jesus perhaps hinting at the limits of our ability to justify judgments on ourselves and others strictly by observed behavior – good or bad.  The deep mystery of our hearts are as hidden as they are sacred.

So, if appearances in behavior are deceiving at times, what are we to do with our practical judgments that allow us to function in the world?  I think it may just be a question of keeping them in check, always trying to maintain that open space that affirms the deep and abiding wondrous mystery of Who we are, created as human persons.  We need a grounding that can provide this.

“Everyone who listens to these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on rock.The rain fell, the floods came, and the winds blew and buffeted the house.  But it did not collapse; it had been set solidly on rock. 

And everyone who listens to these words of mine but does not act on them will be like a fool who built his house on sand. The rain fell, the floods came,and the winds blew and buffeted the house.And it collapsed and was completely ruined.”

Jesus is talking about actions for sure, but the authenticity of the actions seems to flow from a listening or discerning that springs forth from a grounding that must be solid but also demands an amount of flexibility that can withstand the “buffeting winds” of life.  This deep source or grounding allows us the space we need to honor the unknown and the mystery in ourselves and others without always forcing an explanation.  It’s not a relativity, but rather a solid rock that can move with some amount of flexibility.  Even rocks can move, though imperceptibly perhaps.  If we cannot move, we will “collapse” for sure.

We shortchange the gift of our humanity when we only look for the BIG things.  A grounding that allows us to move and be flexible helps us to appreciate the small or unseen things.  The named saints in history are important but they are not necessarily exceptions.  There are “hidden” saints among us, whom we do not always recognize.  But they (we) are present wherever there is authentic efforts to live from a source or grounding of trust that may or may not be seen by others.  This grounding allows us to both live in freedom ourselves and honor that same freedom in everyone else.

So, I invite all of us to look at each other for the beautiful and mesmerizing unique creations we are – loved into life and held in sacred mystery.  We all live our humanity from the simple and precious divine grounding that can allow us to be open and embracing if we honor the sacred mystery of God living in our lives.  This is how we can look at each other as God looks at us.

Peace

Thomas