‘John was standing with two of his disciples, and as he watched Jesus walk by, he said, “Behold, the Lamb of God.” The two disciples heard what he said and followed Jesus. Jesus turned and saw them following him and said to them, “What are you looking for?” They said to him, “Rabbi” (which translated means Teacher), “where are you staying?” He said to them, “Come, and you will see.” So they went and saw where he was staying, and they stayed with him that day.’ 
Still in the Christmas season we are! On this particular Christmas day, I am struck by so many of us who have gone “home” during this time. For any number of reasons, the elderly and the infirmed seem to pass at this time of year – the holiday season. The number of my friends who have lost parents has grown seemingly so quickly over the last few years. And then there are those who have died at such an early age.
Death is all around us, and indeed a very big part of life. When it touches us personally, it is like a slap, a knockout punch, a stunning pummeling, perhaps even for a while, a seemingly paralyzing dose of reality. What does all of this mean? Even though I “know” that Love is there and in fact intrinsically tied to our experience of the death of loved ones, I can give no comforting explanation of how it is that way. Actually, I am glad that I cannot…yet the questions remain.
When my mom died, several months ago, I can’t say I expected any particular response from those around me. Just to have people around me was enough. Just their being there was important. And I continue to draw off that simple expression of love and support. Not that it changes anything, but it in some strange way becomes a piece of the meaning of death itself. Death and love seem to go hand in hand. I can’t explain that, but it was and is an awareness of connection that we all have, that for some reason, surfaces in the experience of tremendous loss. And it is a connection of love…Real love…Real Life!
This past weekend I saw two films, all of which touched on death in some way: JACKIE and COLLATERAL BEAUTY.
In the movie, JACKIE, in which Natalie Portman astoundingly portrays Jacqueline Kennedy and the disjointed experience she has in the wake of her husband’s assassination, John Hurt skillfully plays the priest character, with whom she confesses some of her darkest grieving concerning the great loss. In one scene, Hurt shares his own struggle as a priest with the meaning of life and death. He describes how, while appreciating his life, when turning out the lights at night and staring into the darkness, he wonders if this (the darkness) is all there is. He then goes on to say that he wakes in a new morning’s light and puts on a pot of coffee. His commentary is that God seems to give us just enough to go on one day more into the mystery of life and death.
Will Smith in COLLATERAL BEAUTY plays a character who has suffered great loss and questions the meaning of time, death and love with regards to his loss. One of the surprising answers he receives concerning Love is that It is as real in joy and life as it is in pain and death. There is somehow this mysterious admixture of the life and death experiences we have that strangely connect us all and ultimately cannot effectively exclude Love!
As I grow older, I am finding that we are left with more questions than answers. But, this does not sadden me so much. Questions are good. They sometimes give us broader perspectives than finite answers. It seems to me that Jesus posed just as many (if not more) questions than answers.
For example, in today’s scriptures, we have a series of questions from all the characters, including an invitation, and a response to the invitation…
“What are you looking for?” – Jesus noticing the disciples following him.
“Rabbi, where are you staying?” The disciples’ response to Jesus which is again a question.
“Come and you will see” Jesus’ gentle invitation.
And then the disciples’ active response, “so they went and saw where he was staying…”
I like to think that life and death are really that simple – question, question, invitation, response. By engaging in questions, we hear the invitations and then we respond. This is the wondrous connection that we all have with each other that is as mysterious as it is beautiful. We are patterned for this connection in God through life, death and resurrection!
Death follows life, but only to help us find our original “home,” which is as New as it is familiar…
“….and they stayed with him that day” – that FOREVER SHINING CHRISTMAS DAY!
Peace
Thomas
The soul is the delicate yet durable cloth woven and laced together in loving pattern by the merciful strokes of God’s Passings…
And the sheen of our soul is the ever-glowing awareness we have of this sacred-stitched fabric.